Personal

2018

Good morning or day/evening or night, reader!

I have had a pretty eventful year, last year. Got to begin my qualification in what I currently love, software development, progress my skills and make plenty of new friends at work and off work. This year I also began making music — which is pretty important to me — after about 2-3 years of being away from it and uninspired, after my album project (along with all my ever created projects) have been accidentally wiped by some Windows Repair issue (had to reinstall everything, everything got corrupted — I think).

Game & Software Development

I’ve done this a large part of the last year, except the last very few months. I’ve improved my skills, learned newer versions of things I already knew, studied other programming languages (like C++, Java Script — more in depth, Visual Basic — which is satisfying to write, tbh), started using at and off work MySQL databases, access and logic (using NHibernate, Microsoft’s EF Core), doing server and client websites from 0 — Microsoft ASP.NET Core for the server and Sencha for the client side.

Family & Friends

This year has been the best year for it. I’ve never been this close to my boyfriend’s family since I moved here on December, 2015. I also got to finally meet my family from home — Romania — once again, we had a fantastic time and reunion. Got to speak with most of the people that I grew up with and my grandmother which is metaphorically my mother (since I grew up with her), discovered that she has cancer. She is currently on the process of beating it, she is and always been a fighter, cancer should be like a fly around a pile of poo.

Alongside family, at the end of this year I met 2 very good, light-hearted and intention-warmed people, which I am very thankful for. Usually my private friendships do not last very long and this year I tried to prevent that, by trying not to fuck up or annoy everyone around me.

Speech & Anxiety

Nothing much to see here. I’m still a little bitch, but I started to directly do not care just about that, which makes me not care about overloading thoughts or too many shits given. That doesn’t always naturally work, but sometimes feeling sad feels good.

Personal Development

Have been trying to be more self aware this last year. I focused a lot on personal development and how my mind works and trying to understand certain sides of my mind and try to self-help myself, even though throughout the year, I’ve been thinking to meet an actual therapist, but never did. At the very end of last year, one of my very good friends (Phoebus) have had troubling moments — like most of us have — and he had taken a personality test 16Personalities, recommending me to take one as well. It turned out I have cancer. Just kidding. I have ISFP personality (disorder) which naturally is me caring too much and being overly kind to people. So with that, I attempted to try to cure overloading by really just ignoring specific aspects my brain tends to randomly focus on. Yay me.

I also discovered that if you love things or people TOO MUCH, they can be destroyed, love’s literally strong.

Sex

Male

2019

I don’t have many year resolutions this year. I just try to do the same, but better. I want outcome and learn to be classy and a responsible young adult. Also, would love to be able to sell some of my projects and get some extra money.